Thursday, April 7, 2011

You get NOTHING

By Hoyne LaMoyne and Ogden Elston

Turns out the source of that brownie smell enveloping the loop area on windy days is the Blommers Chocolate Factory catty-corner from the Jewel on Milwaukee/Kinzie/DesPlaines. 

As the "blah" sound in its name indicates, the Blommers Plant is more Slugworth than Wonka, but according to their website they're hiring. 

Among the qualifications a prospective Blommer's Q/A Tech: Must be able to taste and consume chocolate and related products

Sounds easy enough.  Unfortunately, s/he also:
  • Must be able to climb stairs, walk, stand for prolonged periods of time
  • Must be able to lift up to 50 pounds
  • [Must be able to deal with] hot, cold, dusty, noise conditions
  • [Preferably would have a] Bachelors of Science in Biology, Chemistry, Microbiology or related field [with] Three years experience or commensurate level of experience and education

According to its website the job has been open for almost a year, which raises the obvious point: Why hasn't blommer's run a golden ticket contest to fill the job? 

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